My excitement in realizing the Kentucky State Fair is next month was quickly tempered by the discovery that I have missed the deadline to enter the “Vegetable Critters” Competition by just three days. Once again, I will not be realizing one of my low-key life goals of putting googlie eyes on a misshaped potato and calling it President Nixon or whatever. If you’re not familiar, the rules are “Odd (vegetable) shapes grown naturally. Decorations should enhance natural growth for interpretation of exhibit.” I love a lot of things about the Fair, but nothing quite as much as that small section on the table full of award winning vegetables, adjacent the gigantic overgrown pumpkins with the unassuming paper plates holding an art form I truly admire.

Art is open to interpretation, of course, but my take on this beauty queen is that it represents Miss America only she had a tiny tomato for a head. I’m not going to get into the implicit social commentary but I will say that “Miss Tomato U.S.A.” does not look very happy in spite of that victory tiara atop her tomato. Although I’m mildly sad I cannot enter this year, I am hopeful the good people of Kentucky will bring their A-game to Vegetable Critter Contest – 2022. First Place Prize is $6 but the Vegetable Critter Community knows it’s all about the bragging rights. Watch this space for this year’s best Kentucky Critters or better yet stop by and see them yourself. Just follow the fragrance of the freshly hung tobacco, through the beehive and honey section and straight towards the room with the fancy melons. It may take some time to seek them out amidst the grandeur of the surrounding produce, but rest assured the Vegetable Critters will be there waiting. Humbly hoping that one day they’ll get the recognition they so richly deserve.